The Anti-Feminist Woman

Finding Joy in who you are

Barbara Henderson – the anti-feminist

There are a lot of totally unhappy people in this world.  One that comes to mind often because she stays in the news is Hillary Clinton.  She could win all sorts of awards as an unhappy unattractive person. Obviously, I can’t stand her.  If you like her you probably won’t like this article, although it isn’t really about her.  It is about claiming who you really are and being content in living your life.

First of all, you are either male or female.  There are thought patterns and medical procedures that can appear to alter that, but no matter what surgeries one has, or what hormones they take, they are still the same gender as they were born.

Neither gender is better or worse than the other.  Both are good.  Both are blessed by God.  Both are created to fill certain roles.  Women are better at being mothers than men.  Men are better than being fathers than women.  Duh!  This doesn’t mean that one parent can’t raise a decent child, because he/she can.  But, it does mean that a father who is standing in as both parents will still always be a father.  A mother who is standing in as both parents will still function as a mother.  There is no shame in that.  There is nothing wrong with that.  What is wrong is that men and women are being pushed to be more gender neutral.  This is an impossibility.  You are a man or a woman.  Enjoy being yourself!

Ladies, young women, old women, teenage girls, young girls, YOU were created by God Himself.  Don’t try to be who you aren’t.  Accept being born female as a specific gift from God to you personally. Sadly, there are people today, and especially some women, who hate women.  They hate themselves because they aren’t men, and they hate men even more.  These women have very loud mouths.  Honestly, looking at them and listening to them makes you wish there was a third choice for gender – kidding of course.  The older feminist crowd is obviously miserable.  The younger feminist crowd is just as obviously quite slutty.  They think they are really showing the world how free they are by sleeping with anyone who is willing to take what they give away free.  There may be some in-betweens there that sort of look like they are something between a hag and a slut.  This group may have to pay someone to take what the younger women are giving away free. I really don’t care to have all the details on just how that actually works.  As you can see, I find feminists totally disgusting.  I do acknowledge that God loves them.  He wants them to turn to Him for salvation.  I know some of them claim to be saved, but their actions do point in the opposite direction.

So, what are women who want to actually act like women supposed to do? 

First, they are to see what boundaries are set for proper Christian behavior in the Bible.  The Bible doesn’t say a woman has to get married.  It doesn’t say she has to be a slave to a husband if she does get married.  It does say sex is for inside a marriage of one man and one woman.

A woman is supposed to obey the commandments, follow the instructions of Jesus to love others the way He loves us, and to treat others the way we want to be treated.

Second, within the boundaries of proper and right behavior set by God a woman is free to do whatever she wants to do and is physically and mentally able to do.  Feminists would love to restrict women from doing what they want to do unless it goes along with their agenda.  If you happen to be a woman who has been blessed with a husband who is able to provide for you and your children, maybe you do not plan to have a job that contributes to the family income.  Maybe you actually do want to stay home and raise your own children.  Nobody is stopping you Go for it!  Of course you definitely will be ridiculed and looked down on by the likes of Hillary Clinton – and her sort – you know the ones I am talking about.  Hillary didn’t decide to stay home and bake cookies.  She doesn’t want you to be able to make a different choice. 

So ladies of all ages, it is time for a little self-definition. Just exactly who are you? ( see my article on self-definition here    http://tobarbara.blogspot.com/2011/06/self-definition-who-are-you-really.html )

Second, it is time for a lot of self-discipline.  After you figure out who you are, then you need to figure out what is required to actually live the life a person with your self-definition is supposed to live.  Here’s a hint.  If you are a Christian, God has clearly set down the boundaries within which you are supposed to live.  In a nut shell it is love one another as Christ loves you. 

Within these boundaries there are many many choices that you are free to make.  Do you love fishing?  Personally I don’t, but I do know a lot of women who actually love fishing.  How about hunting?  Yes?  No?  There is no wrong answer.  Do you think you would like a career in science?  Teaching?  Auto racing?  Motorcycle repair?  Then go for it.  But don’t’ be pushed into doing what has traditionally been considered a man’s occupation simply because you have to prove that women can do anything a man can do.  Confident women are born knowing that anyway.

OR – perhaps you actually want to be a married woman who stays home and raises her children.  This requires skill, ability to live on a budget, patience, and a ‘get the job done’ attitude.  You may wind up doing handy-man repairs on a daily basis, cleaning like a cleaning lady, cooking like an overworked chef, stain removal of dirty laundry, mowing the grass, and even painting the house.  I have no doubt you can do anything that you are physically able to do if you actually want to do it.  I can also guarantee that if you chose to stay home you will be looked down upon by many women and society in general.  You will be seen as a relic of the past, a woman who is dominated by a man, a woman who is afraid to try to make it on her own, and any other insult that can be thrown at you simply because you were brave enough to just do what you want to do with your own life.  Don’t let social or political pressure cause you to do things that are wrong or things that you simply don’t actually want to do.

I recently read an article about women being given preference in science fields, only to drop out of their particular field of science at a rate much higher than men.  It is a clear case – at least it is to me – of women being pushed into going into a field of study that has been traditionally male dominated simply because they can.  There was no real deep love of their work and no personal calling to go into that field.  If they had stuck with it they would have wound up hating their job and probably deeply in debt.  The same thing probably happens quite often to men or any human being who goes into a field of work for any reason other than they feel called to that type of work.

Many years ago after finishing high school, my grandmother went to ‘teaching school’ at the age of seventeen.  The school lasted six weeks.  She started her first job that fall.  Grandmother said that the first week of teaching school was spent being counseled on whether or not each student should be there in the first place.  The instructors said, ‘A teacher must be called to teach just a preacher is called to preach, or they should find another profession.’  Wow!  But we Christians can add more to that.  We should be called to do whatever we decide to do as our profession.  A basic way of determining your calling is first decide what is possible within the boundaries of your self-definition.

Then decide what things actually interest you.

Then look at your actual opportunities.

Then you make a choice and go for it.  
(An aside here is that Grandmother taught 4 years before she married Gramps. She also taught again during the war years. She said she had 72 students one year, and every student learned because: 
the material was presented clearly
She required them to learn
Parents backed her up - the poor kids had no where to hide.  It was 'get your lessons done - or stay up all night until you get with the program'.) 

My husband Jerry is a multi-talented guy.  He will tackle anything.  He is good at everything.  I realize he is unusual and I am very thankful for him.  His interests are automobiles, (the faster the better), all manner of carpentry and wood working, and some sports that are not really safe.  He could have built his own  race car and then been a professional driver, but he never really had the opportunity.  It came down to mechanics or carpentry.  The Air Force trained him as a mechanic.  Carpentry is his hobby.  I think he would have been equally content in carpentry but auto-repair was the opportunity that presented itself.  If he had actually been determined to be a carpenter he could have pursued carpentry, but he is took what was offered.  He has never regretted it.    That is how it often works.  It could have been bad if he had spent his life regretting being a mechanic instead of a carpenter.  Personally for me it has meant that I always have had a dependable vehicle, and I have also had someone who does all sorts of building projects for me.  (I am getting a new hardwood floor this month installed by my sweet husband, AND he is adding a back porch to the house after that.  What a wonderful blessing!)

A single woman does have to support herself.  She does need an education or training for a good paying job. Ladies I highly recommend that you get technical training or a college degree in some field that interests you to the extent that is possible. It isn’t in a woman’s best interests to sit around and wait to be rescued by a man.  If she does get married then there are more choices to make.  I will tell you flatly that the best choice for women with children is to do what is best for their children.  This does not mean that you must give your children the best.  It means you must do what is best for your children. That means you give them as much of your time and attention (and discipline) is possible.  It may mean your career will be interrupted.  Big deal! 

There is true freedom in Christ Jesus.  Don’t be led into bondage by women who don’t know Christ.  You are not obligated to fight against men. You are not obligated to feel sorry for yourself because some discontented feminist thinks women are not treated fairly.  Really – give me a break.  I freely admit I am not treated fairly.  My poor husband works all the time to support a wife who has been too sick to actually bring in an income for most of our married life.  In return I try to spend money wisely and stay cheerful.  How is that fair to him? Our main difficulty is that I love spaghetti and he hates it.  He is sorry I have been sick.  He never feels sorry for himself.  I know he would be a rich man if he hadn’t chosen to support his family all these years.  I love being his wife.  I don’t bake cookies because I really don’t especially care for most cookies.  I sit around and type on the computer for recreation.  I have a good life.  I am thankful to God for His blessings.

Ladies, teenage women, old women, young women, sisters, aunts, and friends, just concentrate on being the person God created you to be.  You have specific gifts.  One of those gifts is being born female.  It doesn’t make you better or worse than men.  God made you female because that will be most helpful in whatever tasks He has for you in this life.  It is sort of like skin color.  It doesn’t make you better or worse to have more or less pigment in your skin.  It makes you better suited to take the gospel to those Christ puts in your life.  That is all there is too it.  Enjoy who you are.  Tell the world ‘Jesus Saves’.  That is not limited to any age or gender.  Love your family.  Do what is right according to the word of God.  Remember, ‘For the Lord is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.  Psalm 100:5